Politeness

Mostly through repetition, and my grandmother. In my family you had to invite every single person at the table to eat before picking up your chopsticks, from the oldest down, and if I skipped someone she would simply look at me until I started again. Greeting visitors with folded arms was another one. It felt like a chore back then, but it's automatic now. And yes, I think it matters a great deal. Politeness costs nothing, and it makes daily life run more smoothly; a quick 'thank you' to the security guard or the delivery driver takes two seconds. I notice it most when it's missing. A few weeks ago a man pushed past me in the queue at a pharmacy and then acted as if I were invisible. I didn't say anything, but I was fuming all the way home. As for young people, I don't buy the idea that we're ruder than our parents. We're just less formal. We might not bow our heads to every neighbour, but most of my friends are thoughtful where it counts.